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Translated, for my many international readers:

“Hi Viv, this is naughty Andre.”

‘That’s lovely. Fuck off.’


Ok, so let us understand this. This guy clearly is using Facebook as a free on-line dating site, which I suppose is a cheap way of doing it. But that is his pickup line: “Hi, Viv, this is naughty Andre” That’s it?

I am not at all interested in online dating or engaging potential lovers on Inbox, but while we are here, since when is it enough to announce that you have a penis and therefore a woman must pay attention to it, naughty or not?

Since always.

‘Hi’ or “Hi this is naughty Andre’ is similar to a caveman going ‘Ugh!’ while swinging his knuppel around. Or in this case, not even physcially showing up to do it, but making a scribbling about it on the cave wall.

The inbox behavior of the many men who cross my Facebook path reminds me of how much of society still has that old male patriarchy thing going. It is a statement of entitlement. I grew up in a patriarchal Afrikaans culture where old, ugly, or fat, drunk men thought they owned women just by gawking at you and if you make eye contact, you have automatically consented., so I am aware of this phenomenon.

Well, ‘since always’ is changing. It cannot be good enough that you just present yourself as being bedicked and vaginas offer themselves (although I guess you must have a good enough success rate to carry on doing it like this.)

I am not expecting that you slay a dragon or drive miles in an oxwagon to sit by the ‘opsitkers’, but jirre: “Hi” or “Hi, dear, where do you live?” straight into my inbox is as if I am walking into a bar and you say ‘Hi’ and I make eye contact you grab me by the tit. That is what you are doing.

Listen caveman, Facebook is intended to be a social device whereby you can share and connect with selected people on an open platform and use the Private Message for private conversations. The Inbox is the private part of Facebook and you just touched me there without permission.

Fuck off.


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